such shame and guilt

hola loved ones. i have been MIA and do apologize. i just had my head in the clouds and my mind hasn't been so clear. earlier i was reading roya's blog and it hit me how long it's been since i've felt that clarity of purpose. i hope that we can all get that feeling--and that we can all sustain it. i think it's the steadfastness in life that is the hardest. we all go through our ups and downs but when we're up...it's hard to really stay there=but i guess that kinda' defeats the purpose of life--i mean, always staying up--if there were no 'down' times, i guess we wouldn't really know when we were 'up' and doing all the right things and staying focused.

anyway. i just got back from a 6 day trip from chicago and feel great to be back. i looked out the plane window as we were heading in to our "final descent in to Louisville" and i saw how beautiful Kentucky really is. clear blue skies and the darkest and most lush green grass and trees. i really urge you to come and visit here sometime--to visit me and this beautiful land. it made me realize that although i'm not living in a huge city--atleast i'm living in a great environment where you can drink the water from tap and where you can take in all of nature and all it has to offer. it's just beautiful here!

on a different note, i got a fulltime job! yay! i shoud've mentioned this earlier but it still hasn't hit me. i'll be working at a drug and alcohol rehab center as an inpatient counselor. i'll be a lower level counselor and i'll be able to really learn on the job. the hardest part of this job is the population of dependent people that i'll be working with but it's also the most amazing aspect of the job. i'll be able to really learn alot about myself and to be able to also give hope to others.

i'll post an update once i start. i'll also continue my radio gig although i may have to drop sunday morning classical music hosting. i just don't want to work all the time and can't fathom waking up on sunday morning-working til 2pm and going in to my fulltime job that same day from 2-10:30pm. my new work schedule is from sunday to thursday.
yay!